As you grow and mature in your life we often pray for God to send us the person who best suits us but when you meet that person, no one ever said they'd be perfect. They may do some things that you don't like. Their family may not mesh well with yours. Some values may not completely meet up. Knowing all this, this makes it difficult. It's hard to figure out what you are willing to deal with and what is an absolute deal breaker. I have no doubt that every guy I've ever dated or will date in the future loves me, but I think no one has the right to tell me that I don't realize how much someone loves me because I've made the decision to be apart from them. That statement may be more appropriate when I'm in a relationship, openly dogging a person. Otherwise how can one say what I don't realize? How can one be bold enough to make a presumption of who best suits me and that there will never be no other like him. I'm not blind of the love someone may have shared with me. After all was it not me who was in the relationship? If I wanted to be married by the end of next year, I know where to go, but in the end of the day is my happiness important? Do these concerned people really have my best interest in mind?
I must admit that I'm bold and confident enough to believe that I'm a phenomenal woman. Damn right I am! So phenomenal that after being graced with my presence in a serious, committed, love filled relationship you will not find another woman quite like me. Not saying that you won't find love or that you won't find another great woman because I believe everyone deserves love in the romantic capacity. I do believe you won't find a duplicate of me. You may find better or find worse, but I'm confident in the fact that my personality and heart are unique to me.
If one can tell me someone else is a good catch for me, then exactly what am I to them? Am I not equally if not more of a good catch? What are your standards for a good catch for me? I understand that family and friends will always be your greatest supporters, but I think they should take the back burner in your relationship with a significant other. Their opinions may be valued by you but not by others. After all isn't their opinion biased anyways due to kinship and loyalty? I'm mature enough to be confident in the fact that any relationship that I have chose to call it quits on was for a reason. A reason that best suited the circumstances. Being the phenomenal woman that I am, I have confidence that whatever God has for me, is for me and me alone. I can try to run from it, ignore it or denounce it but what The Lord wants to be so, shall simply be so. Neither relative nor friend can determine what's best for me. I love that my family has always taken a passive approach in my dating life. Expressing to me directly their thoughts, addressing my significant other when necessary but for the most part believing that the phenomenal woman they raised will make the decisions she finds best for her... Faith that God will be the captain of that ship.
Whomever the good catch for me is, only God knows. And only He can reveal that to me. No forced unions, pressure from outsiders and nosy people will ever be something that moves me. In my time I've met lots of good catches, but perhaps they just weren't the best catch for me. Maybe for someone else. Or since I'm not married maybe it's not inaccurate to say that they may not be the best catch for me yet. You can't sell your relative or friend to me without telling me how I compliment him or he benefits or adds to me.
In church today, the Pastor said that the successful relationships are those who live in harmony. If you think of a piano, the white and black keys must be played together in harmony. It's impossible for them to play the same note yet they work together perfectly. I don't desire the "good catch" that others may foresee for me. I desire what God has... Frankly I don't desire what outsiders may think God has for me or what many like to say God told them, because I think He's fully capable and we gave a strong enough relationship that He will reveal what's for me to me. No need for a middle (wo)man. I desire one who also views me as a good catch and a woman whose needs and desires are also important in being fulfilled. I desire one whose family and friends are supportively standing on the sidelines, so eloquently tending to their own business and who love me not just because of who I'm with but because they desire what God has for me as well and they love me unconditionally. Whatever is for me is in God's hands...and I mean that. The rest is all pointless to talk about, argue about, allow others to make me upset about, or be forced to make a decision upon. I refuse to believe that I will never encounter someone who has loved me as much or more than someone from my past. God is too great and too vast to allow love to be limited to just one. I choose to believe that if your love is so grand amongst other things being in harmony, then I may come to a point where I don't desire to experience the love of another man. No other man will be comparable. Until it's relevant... I breathe on... I'll date if I desire and I'll live my life in peace.
P.S. You shouldn't find more peace or happiness alone or away from your "good catch". #thoughtstoponder 😉
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