Just imagine that you were headed on a cruise and you boarded the wrong ship but didn't notice it until after it took sail. You probably didn't pack appropriately. You may not even want to go where that ship is taking you. You don't even have a room on this ship for Heaven's sake. How could you end up on the wrong ship?
I think of this when I think of developing relationships with people. If you don't or can't board the friend"ship" first then you can't expect to end up in the right destination. So what's up with all of my talk on relationships? It's cuffing season and everyone else is talking about it. Plus I'm a sucker for love and romance... it's just what I do. Lol.
I'm a firm believer that the person of your romantic interest should be a friend first. If they can't display friendly qualities before or even after titles have taken place, then perhaps that person is caught up in the idea of being in a relationship and not interested in building a foundation or a strong friendship. I understand that affairs of the heart can taint the outcome of a relationship that didn't work out since hurtful things may have occurred or feelings may still be involved, but it is my belief that if the relationship started with a true unintentional friendship in the first place, then certain things are repairable to maintain at least the strong friendship.
Am I friends with each guy I've dated before I've dated? I think in my mind I thought I was and sometimes fooled myself into believing that I was. Judging from how some I ceased communication with all together after dating or some did more hurtful things afterwards, then I'm not very sure that my initial thoughts were accurate. Obtaining and maintaining a unintentional friendship from the gate is hard if two people like each other. It turns into a friendship being treated like a relationship prematurely and ultimately overshadowing the actual friendship.
Is it easy for two people who have dated to be able to maintain a friendship after dating? I won't say it's easy, but I do believe it's possible. Anyone can remain cordial but not everyone who shared the words "I love you" can remain close. I understand that times change and people's lives change, but I've always been one to genuinely desire to know that my past love is well and enjoying their life. I just can't shake genuine care.
I think of this when I think of developing relationships with people. If you don't or can't board the friend"ship" first then you can't expect to end up in the right destination. So what's up with all of my talk on relationships? It's cuffing season and everyone else is talking about it. Plus I'm a sucker for love and romance... it's just what I do. Lol.
I'm a firm believer that the person of your romantic interest should be a friend first. If they can't display friendly qualities before or even after titles have taken place, then perhaps that person is caught up in the idea of being in a relationship and not interested in building a foundation or a strong friendship. I understand that affairs of the heart can taint the outcome of a relationship that didn't work out since hurtful things may have occurred or feelings may still be involved, but it is my belief that if the relationship started with a true unintentional friendship in the first place, then certain things are repairable to maintain at least the strong friendship.
Am I friends with each guy I've dated before I've dated? I think in my mind I thought I was and sometimes fooled myself into believing that I was. Judging from how some I ceased communication with all together after dating or some did more hurtful things afterwards, then I'm not very sure that my initial thoughts were accurate. Obtaining and maintaining a unintentional friendship from the gate is hard if two people like each other. It turns into a friendship being treated like a relationship prematurely and ultimately overshadowing the actual friendship.
Is it easy for two people who have dated to be able to maintain a friendship after dating? I won't say it's easy, but I do believe it's possible. Anyone can remain cordial but not everyone who shared the words "I love you" can remain close. I understand that times change and people's lives change, but I've always been one to genuinely desire to know that my past love is well and enjoying their life. I just can't shake genuine care.
Do I agree with the phrase, "Best friends equal the best of lovers" ? Yes and no. I'm one to have mostly male friends, and therefore, they are my best friends. If I don't view you in a romantic capacity, then there is no way that we can be the best of lovers. I think the best lover is someone who has taken the time to get to know you inside and out with the genuine interest and concern for you and not for personal benefit. So if your best friend just so happens to be your lover then that could be a beautiful thing. I also think it can be a tragedy. What worse person to get hurt by than your best friend? We tend to take things more personal when we feel that we have history with a person and know them so well.
Bottom line is that love pours on thick once it gets started but when in the wrong order it can be turned off like a water faucet. This still leaves involved parties with an array of emotions, bitterness and anger. Try liking someone as a friend, developing your everyday convo before making it a relationship. I'm preaching to myself on this one as well because we all sometimes jump the gun prematurely. As I always say, what's for you will be. Keep God first and sail your ship the correct way.
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