Have you ever placed so much hype on an event and then when it occurs it ends up being nothing that you expected? This week is the one week that I've been waiting on for my entire life it seems. No it's not the week that I get married and live happily ever after. Its not the week that i hit the lottery or deliver my first child. It's the week that I graduate and become a doctor. This journey has been tough to say the least. Now that the week is here, the thrill isn't quite there for me. I'm missing several key players from the festivities. It's not everyday that you become a doctor... So for anyone to say what doesn't matter or what's just another graduation needs to just take a simple walk in my shoes. This week I become the first doctor of my family...period. I think that no matter what you accomplish in life, you always look for your mother to be there and to give her approval or to see that warm smile and those teary eyes. This week I'm accomplishing what should be one of the most important milestones in my life, but I have to do it without my mother, sister and nephew. It's not that they didn't want to be here. I guess life is just simply taking its course. The thought of this has stalked me for a while now but to have it roll out before my eyes just really isn't anything that I think I can fully put into words. The day hasn't arrived yet but flying out to Chicago was very difficult for me. I just have a sense of emptiness that no one can fill because some people just an not be replaced. As I close this 21 year educational chapter of my life I sincerely pray for strength. For many reasons I didn't want to attend this graduation, and now that I'm here... I'm still wishing I hadn't.
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